Water Planet

Friday, November 24, 2006

The Way I See It.

Haven't been here for some time.

Has been kept on my toes with NP stuff and PVC...Heck.

Anyway, OBTC ATC (Officers' Basic Training Course Adventure Training Camp) was kind of fun! Saw many kinds of people and officers there. Got to know some officers and staffs as well. I have so much to crap about the experience lah...haha. But haven't found anybody to spill them on yet.

PVC is sOOO taxing. Initially thought that it would be a good platform for me to have a look at different leadership styles and working patterns. Turnout wasn't as good though...

Was told that I was keeping to much tasks to myself...but the way I see it, I was just doing what was within my abilities and my scope. So what's the concern here? Am I robbing others of their reponsibilities?
Could handle those tasks initially. But some hiccups appeared along the way. Picked a few quarrels and arguments that dampened my spirits and motivation. Why kill my spirits when I was all out and ready to do it?
Was told that my working style was kind of autocratic...very much NP liked. I must thank NPCC for that grooming these past 5 years. Probably some people thought it did not work. to a certain extent, I thought so too. I probably should adopt different strategies.

According to my judgement, yes, my sole and only judgement... There are just some people that....are....yeah.Shouldn't say anything here. I trust my judgement unless they can prove me wrong...which have been otherwise so far! I would like to use the five words chain May Lwin used yesterday here but I deem it as inappropriate and inconvenient.

For those "poor souls" who have been yelling injustice....please. Spare me. Let me give you a word of advice:
"You can't stop people from having the wrong opinions about you. But you can always stop them from being right aout it"
Think it through man...and stop complaining.Heck.

Sometimes, I think that you can't be all outright and honest in working environments. All those thing about transparency are only to a limited extent and for the sake of nice sounding. This is my view, prove me wrong if you can. The way I see it, I really gets so crappy and fake sometimes. Working surely involve some form of strategic thinking and maneuvering.

Ever questioned my purpose for joining this PVC thingy? Ever wondered why I'm trying to get along with these people I hardly know?

The way I see it. Some people are just too clouded. Not some, but MANY. Seriously. Or maybe I could be the clouded one who failed to see the crystal clear judgement of the others. From my dealing with the kind of people I had before, I can come to a conclusion that YOU are clouded. You don't have to buy me.

This whole PVC thing has been taking a toll on my other stuff.
I haven't had anyone quarrelled with me and staring at me with huge glaring eyes. I could hardly believed that that was the person I so hit it off with...
It was also the first time I had someone walking off me. That feeling was far from great.
All those doubts and questionings and antagonising...
Those words, "You're not helping"... They weren't music to my ears. They pricked.
I might as well you give me a punch in my face and rub all of those crap off.

As time goes by, I feel like I'm crumbling apart. Things aren't looking better. They are so unpredictable.

You said I was running away from my problems. Well, I'm not. Any idea how hard I have been trying to rectify things. I have been waiting to clear things up with you. But the way I see it, you're the one running away....
Sometimes, I may wonder, why am I trying so hard, especially with the people around... But then again, I think back...then I see the reason that I'm striving for.
I hope for the day when things get back to what they used to be.man.

mE posted at 11:11 AM